Dear Dad,
When you told Mom you would kill yourself if you stayed with her, that really hurt me. How could you say that? If your marriage was that bad, why didn’t you talk about it with Mom? Why did you have to cheat on her? Did you only care about yourself and what you wanted?
After talking with Mom, she is ok with the divorce. She actually thought about leaving you when you got really sick and she noticed a significant change in the man she married. She didn’t leave you because in the Catholic faith it’s ‘death til us part’ and you work through the challenges. She also couldn’t support David and me on her own. I don’t think she was completely blindsided by the divorce since she thought about leaving you. A lot of people in Midland said the man she married is not the man she divorced. Mom is a lot happier now, I can see it and it makes me happy, she deserves it.
I know you blame Grandpa for your divorce but you’re wrong. Grandpa wasn’t in your relationship. Just because he divorced doesn’t mean you were destined for a divorce. David and I are both concerned we might end up getting divorced but in this day and age it’s very likely and not because we come from divorced parents. When I started high school I was surprised how many students had divorced parents; but that will happen when you go to a Catholic school for 8 years where no one’s parents are divorced.
I resent that you didn’t spend time with me; Mom and Grandpa told you more than once you need to spend time with your kids. You ignored them and now we don’t have a relationship. I know you came to my dance recitals but one event you didn’t make it to that I still remember is my high school band senior night. The game was moved to a different night because the football field flooded and you had to work that night. You always worked early and late, I was in bed before you got home and you left before I woke up in the morning. When I hear about relationships between a guy and his daughter I get jealous. One dad gives his daughter french fries when they spend a day together at the park even though her mom doesn’t allow her to have them. I don’t remember anything like this with you.
I don’t want to have a relationship with you now. I’m better off without it, Mom has always been there for me along with other male figures. I don’t think you are capable of having a good relationship and I would end up getting hurt. Both people have to contribute to the relationship and that’s where I think you are incapable.
I wish you and Mom’s relationship hadn’t ended this way but all in all it’s better this way.
Love,
Your Daughter
